TED HAGGARD CURED OF HOMOSEXUALITY

He’s baaaaack! Ted is back momentarily and soon to take on a new life as a shrink. His wife too. He was out in Arizona taking the cure which consisted of massive doses of the powerful drug, Homonomo. They locked him in a room with nothing longer than it was wide. Yeah, Teddy…you don’t do meth. Liar. As my old bud Trang says, “it opens you up!” He missed out on the opportunity of a life time with a new church he could have called, “Butt Buddies for Jesus.”

We’ve been having some warm weather after the freezing cold and snow. The huge piles of snow are shrinking, and hopefully we won’t get any more blizzards. Knock on wood. I fear being too cocky (woops…sorry Ted.) What if Ted is in a public restroom and catches sight of a penis at the urinal next to him. Is it like an alcoholic being faced with a drink? Does he take it? They have non-alcoholic beer. Perhaps there’s a non-homo…nah…I won’t go there.